Code Name: Geronimo
The search for the world’s most wanted criminal was approaching its 10th anniversary when a group of US Navy SEALs stormed a compound in Abbottabad, Pakistan and shot Bin Laden dead in front of his wives. It was reported that immediately after Bin Laden’s death, a Navy SEAL radioed, “For God and for country… Geronimo… Geronimo… Geronimo” – hence our title of Code Name: Geronimo. This is the story of the SEALs that carried out the mission and the people who orchestrated it.
Imagine if you will that one day, on the set of crime series CSI: Miami, the whole cast all decided to pack up shop and move to Pakistan. Right from the beginning, it was disappointing to see such a bland group of actors who have all been hired on their looks. Even the three who are making the decisions have “the sexy but quirky” female; in this film she is called Vivien (Kathleen Robertson). When released in December, Code Name: Geronimo will only be available on DVD and Blu-Ray, which is probably where you have seen most of the talent, as most of them remain on the small screen.
Stunner, played by high school jock Cam Gigandet (Never Back Down, Easy A, Priest) is team leader in a group of five that includes Cherry (Anson Mount), Trench (Freddy Rodriguez), Mule (Xzibit) and Sauce (Kenneth Miller). Cherry has slept with his wife, which is causing friction in the squad. It is an unnecessary plot thread and at one point escalates into some ridiculous scuffle during target practice in the gun range that is eventually broken up by their Lieutenant, played by Robert Knepper (Prison Break). The action is so mind-numbingly droll that by the time the SEALs have stormed the house, you’re still frustrated over the idiotic character names.
Code Name: Geronimo boils down to a CSI episode, excruciatingly stretched to a feature-length running time with all the cheesy one-liners, sultry family nonsense and wooden acting you would expect from the Sky Living channel on a quiet Wednesday night. It’s so awful that we began wondering if there were any documentaries out there that tell this story better. The last quarter is the only mildly entertaining bit as the shaky hand-cam style gives the scene some tension but that is the only good part.
Straight-to-DVD? Straight to bin.
Code Name: Geronimo is released on DVD and Blu-Ray on 24th December 2012.
Watch the trailer for Code Name: Geronimo here: