Keeping your relationship strong after marriage
Getting married is a huge milestone that will take your relationship to the next level. The passage of time, however, will make things somewhat monotonous. While that’s a normal progression, many people will be dissatisfied with the turn of events. Studies suggest that boredom can set in anywhere between six months and one year after getting married. Avoiding such tediousness is possible if you and your significant other are willing to put some effort into keeping the marriage strong and exciting. Here’s how to make that happen.
Do not assume
You’re not a mind-reader. The fact that you’ve been living with someone for a number of years doesn’t mean you’re familiar with their every thought. Don’t assume you know what your partner wants, how they feel or what they’re angry about. Communication is the number one essential ingredient for a happy marriage. Instead of making an assumption and acting on it, ask your partner what they feel, why they’re angry or withdrawn. A simple conversation can do miracles when it comes to keeping the marriage strong and fulfilling.
Learn the one word that will improve your marriage
Psychologists suggest using the word “we” instead of “I” or “you” when talking about things that you’re doing as a couple.This may seem like a little, silly change but words can have a profound impact on your emotional wellbeing. In their studies, researchers found out that people who replaced “I” with “we” were happier, calmer and much more satisfied in their marriage than other comparable family units. Going into “we” mode shifts connections in the brain, making people feel like a part of a team. And that’s precisely how you should be thinking to keep that feeling of connectedness to your partner throughout the marriage.
Have a regular date night
Dating the way you used to in the first days of the relationship is probably impossible. You now have responsibilities such as kids, shared finances and serious jobs standing in the way. Nonetheless, it’s still important to have a bit of couple’s time every once in a while. You may feel silly about scheduling a date night with your partner, but it’s a massive game-changer. It doesn’t have to happen every week. Choose a time interval that works for both of you – every other week, once per month, etc. Getting ready for a date, spending quality time together and even getting to flirt a bit will remind you why you fell in love with that person in the first place. Hence, a simple date can keep things fresh and exciting. Plus, it will give you something to look forward to even when everyday responsibilities appear to be insurmountable.
Get your sex life to the next level
Let’s face it – even the best intercouse of your life can get repetitive if you’re doing the same thing year after year. Keeping things fresh and exciting in the bedroom is one of the things that will strengthen your attachment and help you overcome many other marriage difficulties. If you haven’t talked about fantasies before, now is the time to start exploring each other’s desires. You can also get things out of the bedroom for a bit of an adrenaline rush. Remember when you used to make out on the backseat of the car? Give it a try once again; you may find the experience truly exhilarating. Adding toys to your routine is another pretty simple way to ensure diversity. Keep in mind that the best G-spot vibrators will give your wife an experience like she’s never had before. You can also test out other toys designed for couples that will stimulate the two of you simultaneously. The fun options are limitless, so get exploring right now.
Stop taking your partner for granted and express your love often
Wonderful things happen when people get comfortable with each other. They build a new level of intimacy that’s an amazing thing. Getting too comfortable, however, can lead to some negative consequences. Many people who have been married for some time start taking their partner for granted. They assume that a significant other will always be there so they stop expressing their love. Guess what – just because your spouse is by your side at that very moment, doesn’t mean things will remain the same in the future. Use every opportunity to show your partner just how much you love and appreciate them. If you don’t do your best, you may end up regretting your passivity in the future. Showing your love is such an easy thing that you have no excuse. A little note stuck to the fridge with a magnet can do miracles, making the other person feel cherished and appreciated.
Give each other some space
Married people need their friends and separate social circles or favourite activities to unwind. It’s essential to give each other some space. She deserves an evening out with the girls. You deserve a night with the guys. Spending time apart from each other and engaging in favourite activities actually strengthens the bond between two people and contributes to higher levels of satisfaction. So, don’t feel pressured to be by each other’s side during every minute of every day. A healthy, strong marriage is all about balance.
Learn the power of an apology
No matter how hard you try, you’ll screw up every once in a while. Your spouse will do so too. A happy marriage isn’t about doing all the right things and never slipping up; a happy marriage involves the ability to apologise when you know that you’ve wronged the person that you love the most. Many people find it difficult to utter three simple words – I am sorry. These three words, however, have a lot of power. They demonstrate a lot of self-awareness and they express some vulnerability that a partner will immediately relate to. Do your best to swallow your pride and apologise for the moments when you’ve been wrong. That’s the best opportunity for getting closure and moving on.
Obviously, there are no universal rules for a strong marriage. What works for one couple isn’t necessarily going to give another one the same results. By being open to learning and working on strengthening the bond, however, you’ll enjoy marital bliss for many years to come.
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