“Sometimes the conversations with the people closest to you are the hardest to have of all”: Jeanie Finlay on Your Fat Friend

It’s easy to think that, how we view our own and other’s bodies has progressed over years. But in reality, the same prejudices, toxic mentalities and value judgements when it comes to appearance are perpetuated time and time again. It seems less that we’ve progressed, and more that the same views are repackaged for each generation and era, each as damaging as the last.

Nowhere is this fact laid more clearly bare than in the new documentary from Jeanie Finlay (Seahorse), who embarks on a journey with her subject, Aubrey Gordon, to explore current and past ideologies around weight and body image. It all begins with Gordon’s anonymous blogging under the titular pseudonym Your Fat Friend, whose candid discussions of fatness garnered her followers from around the world. Over time, Gordon stepped out of anonymity to become a New York Times bestselling author and activist. But the path hasn’t been an easy one, and Finlay’s film captures with sensitivity not only Gordon’s successes but constant hurdles and difficult confrontations with others, perhaps more so those close to home than keyboard warriors on some other side of the world.

Through bearing witness to Gordon’s journey, the film brings to the fore many taboo-busting questions around societal norms and body image, in particular challenging how the latest incarnation of diet culture – aka the wellness industry – keeps a hold over people’s unhealthy obsession with how they and others look for their own profit, akin to Big Tobacco in the 1950s. It delineates how perceptions and biases toward fatness affect others in social and healthcare settings. It also captures Gordon’s own past and ongoing relationship with her body, as well as her trademark wit and effervescent charm that has endeared her to many through her writing and speaking. Poignant, intimate and unflinching, the documentary is one that provokes thought and empathy, going beyond the usual narratives around body positivity to call for a more profound shift in thinking and treatment around fatness that can benefit everyone.

The Upcoming had the pleasure of an in-depth chat with Finlay about the fascinating path she took to creating the documentary. She shared the challenges and triumphs of filming, emphasising the importance of representation and the impact of societal attitudes on self-image and health.

Sarah Bradbury

Your Fat Friend is released in select cinemas on 9^th February 2024.

Watch the trailer for Your Fat Friend here: